I dont remember the age, but it was before Kindergarten, thought men came into the house at night to load the next days shows into the TV.

  • Lettuce eat lettuce
    link
    fedilink
    1362 years ago

    I thought that when the clerk at the checkout asked, “would you like cash back?” That you could say yes and they would just give you cash straight out of the register for nothing lol.

    I figured that most people were very honest and didn’t need the money, so they would just say no thanks and leave it in the register for somebody who really did need it.

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      462 years ago

      Similarly, I thought one could get more money by asking for change. You give one bill, you get more bills and coins in return, it’s gotta be more, right?

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      142 years ago

      I thought grownups got paid every day and “pay day” was just a special day when you got more money.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    1082 years ago

    I remember thinking that women gave birth to girls and men gave birth to boys, and being really worried because I (as a guy) didn’t want to give birth.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    107
    edit-2
    2 years ago

    So many things…

    I didn’t understand how lie detectors were supposed to work so I thought you could hook someone up and ask something like “does god exist” and you’d be able to get answers to all of life’s big mysteries.

    I thought there was a left and right sock

    I thought wolverines were mythical creatures

    I thought if I tried hard enough I could somehow become older than my older brother like it was just a title or something

    Thanks to DARE any time I saw a skittle with the S missing I thought it was drugs even in a newly opened package

    I could go on…

    • SybilVane
      link
      fedilink
      312 years ago

      I wanted an older sibling as a child and I remember trying to convince my parents they should have another baby. In my mind, if I just waited (my age +1) years, I’d then have an older sibling. It never ocurred to me that I would also age during that time…

        • SybilVane
          link
          fedilink
          22 years ago

          I was an only child and I just wanted someone cool to play with me who I could look up to. Also all my older cousins picked on me and I wanted defence lol

    • Dark Arc
      link
      fedilink
      English
      182 years ago

      Your comment about your brother reminds me that in kindergarten I thought that the line order (alphabetical) had something to do with status. My last name starts with C so I was pretty close to the front, but I had a friend with an A for a last name, so I really wanted to move up.

      I told no one of this of course until long after I’d grasped how alphabetical ordering worked myself.

      • @[email protected]
        link
        fedilink
        22 years ago

        My feet are normalish (well, far too wide but normal length) and my running socks are left and right.

    • @[email protected]
      link
      fedilink
      English
      32 years ago

      My son was PISSED when I explained how his older sister would, in fact, always be older. He was sure he’d catch up.

  • TrenchcoatFullOfBats
    link
    fedilink
    English
    812 years ago

    My dad told me that walnuts were owl eggs.

    He got in trouble when I stole all the walnuts in the house and wrapped them in nose tissues to keep them warm so they would hatch and I would have baby owls.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    English
    77
    edit-2
    2 years ago

    I was trying to figure out what caused wind. I noticed the leaves moving when the wind blew, and I knew that a fan (handheld) also moved wind. So it stood to reason that trees moved causing the leaves to move which caused the wind. And naturally it must be earthquakes that caused the tree to love. And then I thought, we’ll there must be a master tree that started the wind, and the most “logical” place for that tree would be the North Pole.

    So, that there was a tree on the North Pole that caused all the wind.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    English
    73
    edit-2
    2 years ago

    That sheep and goats were same species. I thought sheep were the girl versions and goats were the boys, like hens and roosters.

    Wasn’t until well into my 20s that I finally ran into something that put the spotlight on it… IIRC it was some Farmville type of videogame, which included males and females of both sheep and goats. To me, that stood out the same way a “female bull” or “male cow” would have, so I had a little chuckle at the obvious ‘oversight’. Realized shortly after that I was, in fact, a fucking idiot.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    602 years ago

    I thought black and what television was black and white because history happened in black and white. I suppose that means life in colour happened after the invention of colour tv

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    English
    602 years ago

    I used to tell my kids that the ice cream truck only plays music when they are out of ice cream. My kids are older now and know the truth but think of all of the money I saved.

  • Corroded
    link
    fedilink
    English
    592 years ago

    I thought cats were female and dogs were male. Can you tell I didn’t have pets growing up?

    • JokeDeity
      link
      fedilink
      112 years ago

      I know a disturbingly high number of adults over 40 that refer to every dog as he/him and every cat as she/her no matter how many thousands of times they are corrected on it.

      • @[email protected]
        link
        fedilink
        02 years ago

        Have you been around girls and boys. This makes perfect sense. I think the science might be wrong.

  • @[email protected]
    link
    fedilink
    512 years ago

    I believed until I was 8 or so that beans were a type of meat. When I learned the truth, I had an argument with my older brother with me saying something along the line, “You’re gonna feel real dumb when Mom says I’m right.”

  • edric
    link
    fedilink
    492 years ago

    There was a coca cola plant in my hometown. When we were kids, my dad used to tell us that the huge water tanks that were painted as coke and sprite cans actually contained soda and I always imagined diving in them. Obviously he was just fucking with us, but I actually believed it for a while.