I think I need to call ICE and turn myself in. I’m from somewhere like Barbados, New Zealand, Uruguay or Italy…I’ve been living in the US for sooooo long that my English is practically perfect. Please deport me. My home country misses my economic contributions.

    • @[email protected]OP
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      32 months ago

      Uruguay it is then! Please threaten to send me to a country that has 98% renewable energy and a haven for all things open source. I just might be able to survive with my limited knowledge of Esperanto!

  • oleorun
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    1182 months ago

    YOU WON’T BELIEVE THIS FREE TRAVEL HACK coming to TikTok soon

    • @[email protected]
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      2 months ago

      This product is obtained ‘as is’ and without any express or implied warranties, including warranties of merchantability or fitness for a particular purpose. The government of the USA is not responsible in the case of not having legal means of ingress to the recipient country. The government of the USA accepts no liability for any damages, imprisonment, injuries, torture , kidnapping, extortion, homelessness or losses arising from the use or misuse of this service in the recipient country. Use at your own risk

  • Uriel238 [all pronouns]
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    312 months ago

    Part of the dystopian horror is learning they don’t care where you came from, and often will deposit you right into the hands of human traffickers.

    And they’ll lock foreign-looking American citizens in a room with no contact and no lawyer and say You have forty-eight hours to prove your citizenship. Good luck. Followed by deportation as above. So no, your birth certificate in a hospital in San Diego will not help you.

    And between those places are the detention centers that are packed at over double maximum safe occupancy, which get super dirty and super infected, and the ICE troopers / PSCs would beat the crap out of people for fun.

    Some of the scary bits of the German Reich concentration camp program are already happening here in the US.

  • @[email protected]
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    232 months ago

    Yeah, I was kind of wondering if there was a list of countries from which I could choose to be deported to. I mean my parents were American and I was born in America but that doesn’t matter anymore, right. It would be great to be deported to someplace nice. I quite liked New Zealand when I visited. Do they take requests?

  • @[email protected]
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    202 months ago

    I see well without any documentation we’ll have to run a DNA analysis to try and determination your nation of birth.

    Results are back. 23 and Me reports Yemen with 82% confidence. Wheels up in 10.

  • @[email protected]
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    102 months ago
    > go to the US as a traveler from eastern europe
    > get caught by ice
    > claim you're a french canadian, your accent is actually just an even weirder french
    > get deported
    > free asylum in canada
    
  • @[email protected]
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    -102 months ago

    I don’t get the post. I don’t think there are illegal immigrants from Italy or new Zealand in the USA.